Secondhand Hearts
by omens
Summary: What happens when you fall for someone you can never have? How long can the feelings be denied? A love story you’d never expect. AU Season 5. [Joey.Emma]
1. Prelude To Confusion

**Name: **Chris

**Title: **Secondhand Hearts

**Genre: **Romance/Drama/Angst

**Rating: **M

**Summary: **What happens when you fall for someone you can never have? How long can love be denied? A love story you'd never expect.

_**A/N: This idea popped into my head and the only way I could get rid of it was to write it down. I accept no responsibility for the ensuing bizarreness. First chapter's a bit random, but it will get better. Enjoy.**_

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Prelude to Confusion

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Summer in Toronto was never this hot. Especially early summer.

The temperature and humidity made it seem as if the entire world was moving slower than it actually was. Nobody was in a hurry and it seemed as if there was a heaviness hanging in the air that was uncommon on cool days.

Emma looked up from her place on the porch to where Angela was drawing on the sidewalk with the multi colored pack of chalk Craig had gotten her. She smiled fondly at the memory of drawing with the two of them and Manny that summer afternoon so may years ago.

A loud thump sounded from inside the house. Emma sat her magazine on the table beside her chair and yelled out to Angela, "I'm going inside for a sec, okay?"

"Okay," Angie yelled back.

"Joey?" Emma called through the house. He had come home from work early about an hour before, and headed up for a shower before she left. An entire day selling cars in the hot sun had left him sweaty and uncomfortable and he begged her to stay late to allow him the chance to wash off before he took Angela out for dinner.

She called again. Then heard another, quieter thump coming from the second floor. Afraid that Joey might have fallen and hit his head or something, she rushed up the stairs to the bathroom.

"Joey?" she yelled, flinging the door open, silently praying she didn't find him unconscious on the floor.

He looked at her in surprise as the door swung open, confusion plain as day on his features. "Emma, is everything alright?"

Emma was flushed red with embarrassment at barging in on Joey, who happened to be without a shirt.

"Uh …" she stammered, averting her eyes quickly to the palm tree covered shower curtain, "I, um, heard a thump. I just wanted to make sure you were …" her eyes wandered back over him briefly, "okay."

He smiled at her warmly, missing the way her eyes traveled over him. It never occurred to him that Emma would even dream of checking him out.

"I'm fine. I knocked over the mirror," he explained, pointing to the large full-length mirror that had stood in the corner of the bathroom for as long as Emma could remember.

"Seven years bad luck," she responded with a nervous chuckle.

"I make my own luck," he replied with a wink.

Emma flushed hotly. "I'll just …" she gestured to the shards of glass littering the bathroom floor.

She bent to pick up the pieces, desperate to find a way out of the supremely awkward moment she was in. Joey tried to protest her handling the glass, but she insisted, stating that he was barefoot and was likely to cut himself if he came any closer.

Despite her warning, Joey crouched down in front of her, pulling the trash can over with him. Emma glanced up, gulping audibly at the closeness of Joey in front of her clad in nothing but dark blue sweat pants. She became acutely aware of the remnants of steam in the small room, the smell of Joey's body wash, and the amount of skin showed by her tiny tank top.

She looked up, just to see if he was as jittery in the situation as she was, and saw that he was intently focused on the glass splinters on his floor. But feeling her eyes upon him, his gaze flicked up to her face, locking eyes with her.

Emma had been holding a piece of glass in her hand, the largest one on the floor, when her gaze caught his. She gripped it involuntarily, the butterflies fluttering in her stomach unlike anything she had ever experienced. She yelped when the jagged edge sliced open the skin of her palm and dropped it to the floor.

Alarm filled Joey's eyes and he grabbed her wrist in one hand and a towel in the other. He wrapped the towel tightly around her hand, the blood soaking it almost immediately.

"Emma, this is gonna need stitches." he said, squeezing it tighter.

She shook her head. "It'll stop in a minute. I've always been a heavy bleeder. I'll be fine."

Joey chuckled. "I forgot how much you hate doctors."

"I don't hate doctors," Emma insisted, "I hate **going** to doctors. There's a difference."

He shook his head. Emma was a natural born arguer, had been since she learned to talk. No matter how young she had been she was always able to talk her way out of things, and Joey could never resist caving and being the fun adult in her life.

As Emma predicted, the bleeding subsided after a few moments and she sat on the toilet while Joey bandaged her hand so tenderly it was like he thought **she** was made of glass. She felt a swell of emotion in the familiar settings that she had always felt so safe in.

Everything else … she attributed to the heat.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

That was how it began. But not how it ended.

That night began a series of dreams that unsettled Emma so deeply she was starting to think that she had somehow managed to catch crazy from Craig.

For the dreams were very … bizarre.

Hands that were rough at times and surprisingly gentle at others.

Eyes so dark and deep she felt like she could drown in them.

Lips she knew, but hadn't really known until then.

A voice she could remember from the very beginning, but was unlike anything she had ever known whispered against her ear in ragged breath.

Emma awoke with a start the first morning, sweating profusely and her heart pounding wildly in her chest. She gasped for breath, knowing there was no way she could have just dreamt that.

"What the hell?" she whispered aloud, thankful that Manny was still asleep and couldn't see the state she was in.

Had she really just had an erotic dream about **Joey**?

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	2. And So It Begins

_**A/N: I decided to go ahead and put the rest of what I have done up since I got such a good response. I was really nervous about what people would think of this since it is such an unusual pairing. I'm glad you guys are liking it so far, and no, my other stories are not going to be abandoned in favor of this. I'm too close to finishing a couple of them to quit now.**_

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And So It Begins

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Two weeks and ten days baby-sitting later, Emma had grown used to, and more disturbed by, the nature of the dreams she was having. Each night they grew more and more graphic, causing her to jolt out of bed every morning for a shower as cold as the water would go.

It was crazy. She knew that. Intellectually at least. As for everything else, it was a bit harder to convince herself that they meant nothing.

She told herself that it was perfectly normal. Teenage girls got crushes on older guys all the time. Joey was familiar. He was handsome and sweet and really not all that much older. So she convinced herself that it wasn't really as bad as it could have been.

Emma thought that would make the dreams cease. Logic and reason had a way of helping her when nothing else would. Instead, that night she was subjected to the most intense dream of all. After that she was unable to look at Joey's kitchen counter without blushing.

So she determined it was because she was lonely. Peter had broken up with her a few days before school ended, unable to handle the stresses that came with her recovery. Never mind that getting dumped could push her right back into a relapse so long as he was happy. Add that to the fact that Joey had just broken up with Diane it made perfect sense that she would fixate on him. After all, Diane was only six years older than she was, it wasn't **that** out there. Right?

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"So," Manny said the next morning, "what were you dreaming about last night?"

They were eating breakfast the way they did every morning before Emma headed over to baby-sit Angela; parked in front of MTV in their pajamas. Spike and Snake were already gone for the day, Spike to the salon and Snake to teach summer school, and Jack was at Snake's mother's house.

Emma choked on the cereal she was eating. Amidst coughs, she stared incredulously at Manny. "What are you talking about?"

Manny smiled mischievously. "Don't even try to deny it, I heard you."

"You're crazy," Emma muttered, sinking down into the cushions, flushing hotly.

"Then why are you all red?"

Emma's blush deepened, and she burrowed further down into the couch. "Shut up."

Manny laughed. "Ooh," she teased, "oh. Right there. Yes."

Emma smacked her arm. "Manny. Shut. Up."

"Fine, fine," Manny said, "but you at least have to tell me who it was."

Squirming under Manny's gaze, she shook her head emphatically. "No way."

"Why not? It's not like it was Craig or something, right?"

'_Close, but no cigar.' _Emma thought.

"Right?" Manny prodded, starting to get an angry edge to her voice.

"Of course it wasn't Craig," she told her. "If you must know, and apparently you must, it was Toby. And it was hot. Very hot."

"And very gross," Manny replied. "Fine, don't tell me. But I will find out eventually." She was just glad Emma had something on her mind besides food. Maybe she was finally getting over the worst of her disorder.

'_Yeah, I'll tell you right after I tell Joey.'_

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Hey, Emma," Joey greeted her warmly that evening when he came home from work. "Ange upstairs?"

"Yeah," she said, "She's on the phone with a friend."

Joey sat down the pizza box he was carrying. "You want to stay for dinner? Snake told me he and Spike were going out tonight."

Emma eyed the pizza box warily. When she looked at it all she could see was fat and grease and salt and it made her sick to her stomach.

Noticing the queasy look that came over her face, Joey opened the refrigerator door quickly, as if he had been planning to. "If you do want to stay, would you mind getting the salad bowl out?"

Salad. She could do salad. There was no grease in tomatoes.

She got the bowl out from the cupboard where she always remembered Joey keeping it and noticed there was still a bright red splotch on it, though not as red as it had been. She laughed.

"What's so funny?" Joey asked, arranging the vegetables on the counter.

She pointed to the mark. "I can't believe it still hasn't come off."

The first time Joey and Spike had let Emma watch Angela by herself, she was eleven and Angie was barely two. Angela was supposed to be down for a nap, but the second Emma went to the bathroom Angela had gotten into her finger paints and covered everything in Joey and Julia's china cabinet.

"Waterproof. Right," Joey chuckled.

In that moment Joey seemed to her like he always had. He was … Joey. Sweet, funny, sort of dorky Uncle Joey. Although she hadn't called him that since she was three. He had been part of her life, part of her family, since she was born and anything else was just her imagination.

The next moment sent her back into the panic inducing state she'd been in for the better part of the last month. While struggling to open the vinegar he pulled on the cap too hard and it flew upwards, sending the contents of the bottle splashing over his shirt. He unbuttoned it quickly and threw it across one of the bar stools in front of his kitchen island. Emma gulped roughly at being alone with Joey in his kitchen with him in just a black undershirt.

"Good thing veggies don't splatter," he joked, unaware that Emma was entranced by his forearms.

"Huh?" she asked and flushed when Joey looked at her quizzically. "Sorry, I was…um, thinking. About something."

He nodded. A year earlier he would have asked what it was, falling easily into the teasing relationship they'd always had. Now he figured Emma was worrying over something that had to do her disorder, so he dropped it. The last thing he wanted was for Emma to be self-conscious around him. Especially since he had a favor to ask her.

"So, Emma," he began, "there's something I need to talk to you about."

Panic seized her at the implications his words could have held. Had he noticed the not so subtle way she had been looking at him the past few weeks?

"I was wondering if you would be willing to continue watching Ange after school starts. I know senior year is a big deal, so if you'd rather not …"

"I'd love to," Emma blurted out. Instantly she regretted just cutting him off that way, and felt a blush creeping up her neck. That seemed to be happening a lot lately.

His eyebrows rose at her enthusiasm. "Really?"

Emma's head bobbed up and down rapidly. "I'm not exactly looking for a party-filled senior year. Baby-sitting might be just the thing that keeps me from losing it."

Joey appeared to be running the idea around in his head before answering. He was grateful that she wanted the job, but her reaction was more than a little surprising. Snake had said she was doing much better, but he had seen her reaction to the pizza. He was worried that she was just using baby-sitting as a crutch in her recovery.

Emma sensed his hesitancy and it made her uneasiness skyrocket. She was terrified her bizarre behavior had tipped him off. But she wasn't about to let the opportunity to make some easy money baby-sitting Angela everyday slip away just because she was suffering from a little hormonal glitch.

"Please, Joey?"

He melted under her sad puppy-eyes the same way he had when he had caught her mixing Spike's hair dye in the sink the first time he had been roped into watching her by himself in.

"Okay."

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	3. A Little More Personal

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A Little More Personal

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"It's time we set up an intervention," Manny declared from her perch on top of the basement stairs.

Emma turned around on her bed and looked up her best friend, at a loss as to what she could possibly mean.

"An intervention? For what?"

Manny walked down the steps, her elaborate party shoes click-clacking along the way. "Baby-sitting through the week is one thing, but Em, it's Saturday night."

"Joey's running a contest at the dealership until midnight. He needs me. And paying me double," Emma explained.

"Your parents are gonna be home all night. Can't they watch Angie?" Manny asked, leaning over Emma to riffle through the jewelry box in her lap.

Emma kept her eyes focused on the jumble of necklaces and bracelets in front of her that she had been untangling out of sheer boredom. "Jack has a cold. She could catch it. "

"Em…" Manny whined, pulling a pair of large hoop earrings from the mess.

"Manny," Emma said softly, "it helps. The baby-sitting. Plus, I'm not exactly in a party mood, okay?"

Manny nodded. Emma had gotten a lot better in the past month, anyone could see that. At first Manny had chalked it up to the dreams that she was still having which were apparently becoming less frequent but more detailed if the noises she made were anything to go by. They seemed to embarrass her, so Manny had stopped teasing her about them, but her sullen moods lessened when they began. Other than that, the only thing that seemed to lull her out of her funks was being around Angie. And she could see why. Angela was a great kid and she adored Emma.

At least baby-sitting was more normal than sex dreams.

"Alright," Manny sighed, "but Chante really wanted you to come."

"I'll bake her a cake or something," Emma quipped. She stood up and headed for the stairs.

"Tell Joey and Angie I said hello," Manny called after her, stooping to choose a bracelet to go with her outfit.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"_You're so beautiful."_

Emma whimpered in her sleep at the images running through her subconscious mind.

_A large, muscled hand crept its way up her thigh._

Joey turned the key in the front door, exhausted but happy at the way the evening had turned out. The lights were off in the living room when he went in, the only illumination coming from the television.

He was about to call for Emma when he heard a sound coming from the direction of the couch. Setting his briefcase down on the hall table, he headed over and a warm smile broke across his face. Emma was curled up on the couch asleep, her face buried in the pillow.

She stirred, rolling over onto her back and arching up slightly. Another soft noise escaped her throat. A quiet, but definite, moan. And then she arched up further before turning back over, giggling.

Understanding washed over him and he felt himself blush. Emma was obviously having a very explicit dream. A chuckle fought it's way from deep inside his chest. It wasn't as if Emma was a little girl anymore, she was 18 years old. This kind of thing was perfectly normal.

"Emma," Joey whispered as he rubbed her shoulder in an attempt to wake her up, "Rise and shine, Sleepyhead."

Joey managed to wake her partially, and in her half-awake state the sight of Joey kneeling over her was attributed to her dream.

"Mmm," she murmured, "Joey."

He started when her hand found its way to his cheek and began stroking it softly. The other rose up to mimic it, skating over his face and she was smiled drowsily.

"Emma," he said again, louder and more forcefully.

That seemed to pull her out of her haze. Her eyes cleared and a deep flush came into her cheeks as she removed her hands from his face as if his skin scorched her palms.

"Oh my, Joey … I am so sorry," she stammered.

He burst into laughter at the mortified expression on her face, which only caused her to blush further and cover her face with her hands.

He pried them away and spoke softly, not wanting to embarrass her further. "Emma, are you okay?"

"No," she mumbled.

Despite his best efforts, Joey only laughed harder. Off Emma's disbelieving look he tried to stop, but couldn't. "Emma, I'm sorry. It's okay, you were asleep."

"Yeah," she muttered.

"So, what were you dreaming about?" he asked with a grin.

By this time, Emma was beet red all over and wouldn't look him in the eye. She mumbled something under her breath that sounded like 'nothing' and 'stupid' but he wasn't sure.

"Come on," he told her, "it's me here, Joey. You can tell me anything."

"Joey, can we just drop it? Please?" she pleaded.

Even though she refused to look him in the eye, or maybe because of it, Joey knew that she was more embarrassed than he'd originally thought. His heart went out to her, and he sympathized. He had been in similar situations more times than he could count, but Emma was never one to let things like this get to her. Life happened and she dealt with it. It was one of the traits she had inherited from Spike.

"Sure," he told her.

Her mortification beginning to subside, Emma finally raised her eyes up to meet his. The humor was still there, now overshadowed by empathy and protectiveness. Her heart lurched in her chest when she realized just how close Joey was to her. At this proximity, she could see every single detail of his face and she gulped at just how near his lips were to her own. If she leaned forward just a fraction …

"Emma?"

She was jolted out of her daydream. When she focused on Joey's face she saw that he looked concerned. "What?"

"Emma, are you feeling okay?" He pressed his hand against her forehead gently. There was nothing behind his touch other than what could be deemed fatherly concern, but with the first brush of skin against skin she was assaulted by images so vivid she was sure they would come across on her face and that Joey would see.

"I asked if you wanted some hot chocolate," he said as he removed his hand from her forehead, placing it against her cheek in his search for fever.

Her nose wrinkled in distaste. "It's summer."

He laughed. "So?"

She shrugged. No one could ever accuse Joey of being typical. "No, thanks," she said. "I better get home."

She stood up, Joey standing along with and again she as struck by his nearness. She took a step backwards, noting the way his eyes widened at her actions, and told him goodbye before all but sprinting towards the door.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Are you sure she's doing okay?"

Emma paused at the door leading from the basement to the kitchen. It was late, later than she liked to sleep, but she hadn't slept well the night before, feeling her embarrassment more acutely when she was alone in the darkness of her room.

So she wasn't really that surprised when she heard Joey's voice coming through the wood of her door. Joey and Snake always hung out on Sundays, leaving the kids to Spike and the girls.

"Emma's fine. Better than fine, she's really made a lot of progress in the last few weeks," Snake answered. "Why? Has she done anything out of the ordinary?"

"No, not really," Joey said, "Emma just … doesn't really seem like herself."

She pressed closer to the door, careful to stay away from the opening so as not to give them a glimpse of her behind it.

"But I guess that's to be expected," Joey continued, "with everything she's been through."

"But she always seems to be better when she's on her way to your house" Snake told him, "I guess the baby-sitting helps more than any of us realized it would."

Emma could almost hear the smile in Joey's voice when he answered. "Not just her. When Diane and I broke up Angie was really upset. After Caitlin and everything, she just wasn't herself either. Having Emma around seems to make her feel better. Every night she tells me all the fun they've had that day and what they have planned for the next day. She adores Emma."

"And Emma feels the same way," Snake said. "She practically glows when she gets home at night."

"You know," Snake added a few moments later, halting Emma's procession into the kitchen, "she says some pretty great things about you too."

"Really?" Joey asked and Emma flushed behind the door.

"Yeah, if I didn't know any better, I'd think she was a little taken with you."

Joey laughed, while Emma felt her heart thud against her chest before her stomach dropped. "Emma likes me? Yeah, right. That'll happen."

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	4. Reasonable Doubt

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Reasonable Doubt

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"What happened in here?"

The last thing Joey expected to see when he walked into his kitchen after work the next day was Emma and Angela covered head to toe in flour, like the entirety of the room itself, sitting in the middle of the floor and laughing hysterically.

Both girls looked up at Joey sheepishly. They made attempts to school their features, but the sight of his obvious disapproval sent them back into giggles, collapsing against each other to stay upright.

"I'm sorry, Joey," Emma said between chuckles, "I'll clean this up right after I put Angie to bed."

He sighed. That was when he noticed the smell of cinnamon in the air. "Do I smell snickerdoodles?"

Angie jumped up and ran over to the counter where a large cookie sheet was sitting to get him one, causing Emma to rush over and pulled her back from the counter. "Those are still hot," she told her. "Why don't you go take your bath and I'll bring you a couple and some milk in a few minutes."

That seemed to satisfy Angie, who all but sprinted up the stairs. Joey watched her go, a fond smile on his face. He had meant it when he told Snake that Angie had been out of sorts lately, but when she was around Emma she reverted back to the carefree little girl she used to be.

"You're so good with her," he remarked.

Emma grinned. "It's hard not to be. She's such a great kid."

"She's not the only one," Joey said.

Emma's face fell at his words. She should have known that Joey considered her a kid. Being old enough to care for a child didn't change the fact that she was still just a child herself in his eyes. Not wanting Joey to see her upset, she turned away from him quickly, and grabbed a spatula from the drawer.

"What made you guys decide to bake cookies anyway?" he asked, flipping through the stack of mail he had carried in with him.

"Um, Angie wanted to, and I remembered that snickerdoodles were your favorite, so …" she trailed off.

Joey grinned at her. "Thanks," He grabbed at one, but snatched his finger back when it came in contact with the hot metal.

Despite her lingering hurt, Emma laughed at Joey's face as he cursed under his breath, causing him to glare at her.

"Sorry," she said, "but didn't you hear me tell Angie they were hot like two seconds ago?"

The sheepish expression on his face made her melt, and she wanted nothing more than to hide it. So she walked over and pulled his hand into her own, inspecting it carefully.

"It doesn't look too bad, but you should probably put something on it," she told him.

Joey was touched by the tenderness in her voice and in her hands. But that was Emma. She had an innate softness about her that shone through in everything she did. It had to come from Spike, for they possessed the same good heart and desire to do the right thing. Emma's was just a bit more … pronounced, easier to see and never misinterpreted.

Emma looked up, and got caught up once again by the close proximity in which they were standing and the entrancing darkness of his eyes. She swallowed thickly, her heart in her throat.

Joey sensed Emma's uneasiness. But it was more than merely that. She seemed almost to be afraid of something. That was what was so strange. Emma had always been so comfortable in his house, and that was what he wanted. He considered himself to be a permanent fixture in her life and had always wanted her to be as at home there as she was in her actual home.

Her gaze ticked downwards, around the area surrounding his mouth and he felt his own discomfort skyrocket as Snake's words from the previous day rushed back to him.

"_If I didn't know any better, I'd think she was a little taken with you."_

Joey felt the bottom drop out of his stomach out at the idea.

'_No,' _he thought, _'not possible.'_

Emma flushed a light pink, and stepped backwards a bit, clearing her throat uncomfortably.

"I'm uh," she stammered, "I'm just gonna take Angie those cookies," She started up the stairs, but Joey called out to her when he managed to find his voice. She turned back hesitantly.

"Forgetting something?" he asked.

Her brow wrinkled in confusion. "Like what?"

The smile that formed on his face was beyond his control at her expression. "The cookies," He gestured to the counter and she blushed again, racing back to get the cookies to take up to Angie.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Emma!"

Manny tossed the miniskirt she had been holding down in frustration. Emma was wandering listlessly from rack to rack, not bothering to pick up anything other than the clothes Manny shoved in her hands. It was their annual back to school shopping and lunch day. They had been doing it every year since they were five, without their moms since age twelve. And this was the first time Emma acted as though she would rather be anywhere but where she was and it was really starting to tick Manny off.

Seeing no other option to get Emma to answer her, Manny pinched Emma on the arm. Hard.

"Ow, Manny. Why did you do that?"

"Why?' she asked, disbelief written across her features. "Because you're not even here, Em. What is going on with you?"

Emma averted her eyes from her best friend's scrutinizing gaze. She began idly picking at the hem of a dress nearby. She would have done anything at that moment to get away from Manny's over attentiveness.

"So, are you gonna tell me or not?" Manny demanded.

"I'm thinking not," Emma retorted.

"Why?"

Emma sighed in exasperation. "Because there's nothing to tell."

"Then why are you so spacey lately?"

"I'm not spacey!" Emma declared, fighting the urge to stomp her foot petulantly.

Manny big brown eyes narrowed dangerously. She knew when Emma was hiding something from her, and now was one of those times. "Em, we're supposed to be school shopping here. We have free reign with your mom's credit card. Don't tell me you would rather be baby-sitting or something."

When Emma didn't respond, Manny took it as a confirmation of what she had thought. "You would prefer to baby-sit than shop? I know Angie is a sweetie, but come on, Emma."

"What's wrong with wanting to be around a wonderful kid who makes me feel better?" Emma demanded. "Angie's so … innocent. It's like the bad stuff doesn't exist when I'm around her."

Everything about Manny softened at Emma's words. Emma was still recovering and she needed something to take her mind off her disorder and this just happened to be the first thing to come along that she could latch on to. She might have been obsessing a bit, but there were much worse things to loose yourself in.

"Fine," Manny conceded, "At least you're not spending all of your time over there because you've fallen madly in love with Joey."

Manny cracked up at her own joke, cackling for a few seconds until she noticed that Emma wasn't laughing along with her.

"Oh come on, Em. It was funny," she said.

Still Emma said nothing. Averting her eyes from Manny, she began inspecting more clothes that she had no interest in, flushing a bright pink.

"Oh My God," Manny exclaimed as it finally dawned on her, "you have the hots for **Joey**?!"

"Shhh!" Emma hissed, her eyes darting around the store to see if anyone had noticed Manny's outburst.

"Em, are you crazy? Joey's gotta be at least 35 years old," Manny said.

"He's 34," Emma corrected, "and I don't have 'the hots' for him."

Manny raised her eyebrows skeptically.

"I have a tiny bit of a crush," Emma conceded, "miniscule really. Practically nonexistent."

"This is so wrong," Manny muttered under her breath.

Emma was desperate to get out of the conversation. But Manny was having none of it. So when Emma dropped the clothes she had been holding and darted out of the store, Manny set down her skirt and took off after her.

"Em!" she called, pushing past people to get to her. "Emma! You can't just drop a bomb like that on me and then take off."

"It wasn't a bomb," Emma insisted, "It's nothing. I'll get over it."

"How did this happen?"

Emma stopped at her locker, sighing deeply with discomfort that her secret had been unearthed. "I don't even know. A few weeks ago, Joey broke a mirror in the bathroom, I was helping him clean it up, and he wasn't wearing a shirt…"

"So did not need that mental image," Manny interjected.

"Okay, I'm done talking now," Emma said, once more making her way toward the exit.

"Emma, wait," Manny jogged to catch up with her. "I'm sorry, okay? But you have to admit it is a little strange."

"Believe me; I know that better than anybody. I'm not exactly thrilled to feel like this about Joey of all people. It's so … creepy." She shuddered a bit, offset by her own reservations at the notion.

Manny threw an arm around Emma's waist consolingly as they headed down the sidewalk towards home. "You haven't like, put the moves on him or anything, have you?"

An outraged noise escaped from Emma's throat and she shoved Manny's arm away. "Of course not."

Manny put her hands up in defense. "Sorry."

After a few moments of silence as they neared the house Manny spoke up, "I can kind of see it you know."

"Really?" Emma asked skeptically.

"Yeah," Manny told her, "I mean, I'm not attracted to Joey or anything, but he is good-looking. Objectively speaking."

Emma nodded, silently asking her to continue. The tiny little part of her that was still terrified about the entire situation screamed inside of her that if she had Manny's approval it would make it all seem not so wrong.

"And, well, he is a nice guy. A good guy," Manny went on, "Kind, funny … sort of, mature …"

Emma laughed. "That's an understatement," she said as she thought again of Joey's age.

"The whole thing is actually pretty romantic if you look at it a certain way."

"How so?"

"It's forbidden," Manny explained, "A young girl hopelessly smitten with an experienced older man she can never have," she waggled her eyebrows suggestively.

Emma's entire face was red, all the way up to her hairline, and she covered her face with her hands in embarrassment. She groaned into her palms. "This is so not happening."

Manny returned her arm to Emma's waist. "Hey, it's alright. We've all had crushes we're embarrassed to admit to."

"I'm not embarrassed," Emma declared defensively.

"But you're hiding it," Manny shot back.

Emma clamped her mouth shut while she mulled over what Manny had said. There was the obvious reason to keep it a secret, but that wasn't why she was doing it. She just hadn't realized it until then.

"Joey would never want to be around me again if he knew how I felt about him," she whispered.

Sympathy filled Manny's eyes. She hadn't even considered that perspective. All she had seen was the weird factor and then Emma's feelings, but that was common for her. Joey's opinion on how Emma felt had never entered her mind.

"Then I guess we have a problem," Manny said. By then they had gotten back home, and upon catching Emma's wistful gaze in the direction of the Jeremiah residence added, "And some serious planning to do."

…0...0...0...0...0...0...


	5. To The Limit

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To the Limit

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"No."

"But, Em …"

"No."

"What about …"

"No."

Manny sighed in exasperation. She had been tossing out ideas to Emma for the past hour, but so far she had vetoed every one of them.

"Em, I'm trying to help you here," she told her, trying to keep the anger and frustration out of her voice.

Emma threw a disbelieving look at her. "Well so far you've been less than helpful."

"What? Those were some good ideas!" Manny declared.

"Manny," Emma told her slowly, "I am not going to seduce Joey."

"You said you didn't want him to see you as a kid anymore," she said.

Emma groaned and buried her head in her pillow. Manny's plots had gotten more and more ridiculous the longer she went on and Emma wished more and more that she had just lied when she had made the joke about her having a thing for Joey.

"I don't think my jumping him the second he walks in the door is necessarily the best idea." Emma said.

Manny rolled over onto her back on the bed, holding her nails up for inspection. "Then what are you planning to do?"

Just like at the mall, Emma said nothing. Realizing what it meant, Manny rolled her eyes and tossed a pillow at her.

"Manny!"

"You're not going to do anything about the way you feel?" she demanded.

Emma shook her head emphatically. "No way."

"Why not?"

Emma propped herself up on her elbows to look at her best friend at the foot of the bed. "Uh, did you miss the part where Joey sees me as a **child**?"

"Oh come on, Em," Manny said, "Joey does not think of you as a child."

"He said I was a great kid," she argued.

"Not exactly."

"He implied it," Emma said stubbornly.

Manny shook her head. Emma was hopeless. She would have bet a million dollars that Emma would just wallow in her crush until it made her miserable or worked its way out of her system one. Manny just prayed that it would be the latter, for all of their sakes.

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Em, Joey called for you this morning," Spike told her daughter at breakfast that Saturday.

Manny watched as Emma dropped her spoon into her cereal with a splat, her cheeks flushing a light pink. She shook her head. If things kept up this way, Emma was never going to survive this crush.

"What did he want?" she asked, trying, and failing, to sound nonchalant.

"He was in a hurry and couldn't talk much. He wants you to stop by the lot later," Spike told her, picking Jack up out of his high chair.

"What about Angie?" Emma asked.

"She's with his mom for the day," her mom said. She headed for the door and stopped to look back at the girls at the table. "Please, honey, no lectures about the environmental hazards of exhaust pollution." With a final wave, Spike headed out the door.

"Em, you're blushing," Manny teased.

Emma glared at her. "Shut up, Manny."

"Are you planning to blush every time somebody mentions Joey? What are you like around him?" Manny asked, popping a strawberry from her cereal into her mouth.

Still slightly pink, Emma stood up from the table and placed her bowl in the sink. "I'm going to be in the shower if you need me."

"You can't ignore this forever, Emma!" Manny called after her.

To that Emma yelled back, "Oh yes I can!"

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

"Knock, knock."

Joey looked up at Emma's voice to see her standing in the doorway of his office. He smiled at her. "Hey, Emma. Come on in."

She walked in slowly, instantly regretting the fact that she had worn a skirt when she felt the frigid air in the small room. She shivered.

Joey noticed and his brow wrinkled n concern. "You cold?"

"No. It's just, you know, coming in from the hot air," she said. The last thing she wanted was to draw this out longer. In the past week she had found that the less time she spent around Joey, the easier it became to ignore the bizarre feelings she was still experiencing. That was the safest route, for when she spent long periods of time in Joey's company she tended to let her emotions get the best of her and she was terrified that Joey would see it eventually.

She sat down in the chair in front of his desk, declining his offer of a glass of water. "My mom said you wanted to talk to me about something."

He nodded. "Yeah, I do." The phone rang then, interrupting him and he threw her an apologetic look before picking it up.

Emma let her eyes wander around his office while he chatted on about carburetors and fuel lines. She had really only been in Joey's office about a handful of times and she found that it looked just like him. She studied the pictures adorning the walls and desk, taking in the familiar faces of Craig, Angie, Julia, and her mom and Snake, some dating all the way back to junior high.

But the one that she was the most entranced with was one of the oldest. It showed him and Spike on the front steps of Degrassi with Snake and Caitlin behind them, Wheels and Lucy on either side of them. They all looked around sixteen years old and Joey was wearing his trademark hat over his mop of dark hair, grinning devilishly. And there, on his lap, was a smiling little girl with blonde hair curling down around her face.

"Emma?"

She turned her attention back to Joey, who was now off the phone and had sat back down in his desk chair.

"Sorry," she told him, "I don't think I've ever seen that one before." She directed her hand towards the picture in question.

Joey's face broke into a huge grin when he turned to the photo. "Ah, the good old days."

Emma laughed. "You make it sound like it was a million years ago."

"It feels that way sometimes," he told her, "And then others it seems like it was just yesterday."

She nodded in understanding. That feeling had been creeping up on her a lot lately; with senior year looming before her and her attempts to rationalize her crazy crush away with memories, it was all too familiar.

Joey was still gazing at the image on his wall, a wistful expression on his face.

"Joey?" she said softly, "You okay?"

"Yeah, just … thinking," he replied. "So, I needed to talk to you about something."

She nodded.

"My mom took Angie to the ballet over the weekend, and she loved it. Now, she wants to take lessons, and it being summer, the only ones available are early morning. And my mother volunteered to take her and keep her until I get home in the evening."

"That sounds great," Emma said slowly.

"Yeah. She's really excited, but … that means that she's not going to be needing a babysitter," he explained, not really able to meet her eyes.

"Oh."

Emma's gaze fell to her hands, folded in her lap, and Joey thought that he had never seen her look so dejected. He had known this would hurt her, especially after he had asked her specifically to take the job, but there really was no choice.

"Emma," he said softly, "I'm very sorry. But at least now you can enjoy your last summer before college."

"Yeah," she murmured. It felt like everything was spinning out from under her and she didn't know whether to be sad or relieved.

"Well," She stood from her chair, pulling the strap of her bag up o her shoulder. "Then I guess I'll just go."

"You're not angry, are you?"

Emma paused. She was at the door by then, but stopped at Joey's question. Was she angry?

"No," she told him. And she wasn't. But she was more than a little disappointed. For more reasons than she could say.

An idea, a way of consolation, began to form in Joey's mind at the sorrow he saw on Emma's face. The rational part of his brain was telling him not to do it but it was being drowned out by another, more insistent voice that wanted to make her feel better.

"You know, my secretary just quit on me. She got a better job, and left me in quite a lurch." It came out in a rush, before he could think better of it and the surprised look in her eyes wasn't unexpected. She knew what he was going to say before it was even out of his mouth.

"How about you take over? Just for the summer," Joey knew his smile was forced, a little tight. But Emma seemed to either not notice or care about smiled at him the same way she had her entire life.

"I'd love to."

…0...0...0...0...0...0...


	6. Guilty Thoughts

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**Guilty Thoughts**

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"You took a job as Joey's secretary? Have you gone all loopy?" Manny asked in exasperation.

Emma couldn't quite bring herself to meet Manny's eyes, not knowing the guilt that her best friend would be able to see. "Look, Manny, I know what you're going to say-"

"No, you don't." Manny never yelled at Emma, no matter how angry she was. Ever. But Manny was yelling at the top of lungs, so loudly that Emma was forced to shush her to keep her parents from hearing and coming downstairs to investigate. "If you did," she went on, "then I wouldn't have to say out loud the fact that you're just going to make yourself miserable."

"I'm helping Joey. That is not going to make me miserable," Emma insisted.

Expelling a deep breath, Manny sat down beside Emma on the bed, her arm going around her shoulder naturally. "Em … you can barely handle being in the same room with Joey when you see him for twenty minutes a day babysitting. How are you going to cope being around him all day, every day?"

Eyes lowered to her comforter, Emma whispered, "I'll have to."

Manny was beside Emma on the bed in a second, arms twining around her naturally. "Em," she brushed the hair out of her friend's face, "are you sure you can handle this? I know I've teased you about just how much you like Joey-and I'm sorry. But I do actually see that your feelings are pretty strong, huh?"

Emma nodded miserably. Manny propped her chin on Emma's shoulder and squeezed her tighter. It was obvious to anyone that was willing to look that this entire situation was killing Emma. But that was understandable. Joey was someone she was never supposed to have these feelings for. He was a friend of her parent's, never mind the age difference. If Spike or Snake knew how she was feeling … who knew how they would react.

"Emma," Manny said slowly. "Maybe you should call Joey and tell him you've changed your mind."

Emma shook her head furiously. "I can't do that, Manny. Joey only offered me the job in the first place because he knew I was upset about the baby-sitting falling through. He was just trying to be nice." A lone tear slid down the side of her nose, unnoticed by Manny. "I can't bail on him."

"And you can't let yourself be tortured by this crush either!" Manny exclaimed.

Standing abruptly, Emma glared at her best friend, hands on her hips indignantly. "Louder, Manny. Save me the trouble of having to tell my parents please." She collapsed in a huff on her desk chair. Her lips protruded in a pronounced pout that Manny recognized all too well. Emma had dug her heels about this Joey business, that much was obvious. Her disapproval had convinced her to plow ahead and work for him; no matter how much torment she put herself through in the process.

"I'm sorry I yelled." Manny took a deep breath to calm her nerves. "I worry, Em. That's all."

"I know," Emma said sadly. "But this may be just the thing to break me from this … whatever it is. It's a good idea, Manny. I can feel it."

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

Emma walked into Joey's office the next morning with butterflies fluttering madly in her stomach. Smoothing down her hair, her self-consciousness getting the best of her, she knocked lightly before pushing the door open.

A guy, around 23 or 24, looked startled at her entrance before a wide grin spread over his pale face. His feet, which had been propped up on Joey's desk, swung to the floor as he sat up straighter to leer at her. That was the best way to describe it and the skin crawling feeling that accompanied it. It was the same way Jay used to look at her only creepier-which she never thought was possible-even if she hadn't found it creepy at the time.

"Hello," he drawled in a thick-British maybe- accent and continued to look her up and down. "And you would be?"

"Looking for Joey." Emma crossed her arms defiantly over her chest, making no mistake that she was not going to play into his little flirt fest.

The guy stood and she took in his ill fitting suit and scuffed shoes. Straightening his polka-dotted tie, he walked around the desk and leaned against the corner of it. He crossed his own arms with none of the animosity she was showing. Did he think this was some kind of a game? She began praying silently for Joey to walk through the door.

"I'm Chip." The guy said, breaking into her thoughts. "I started work here yesterday. And you are?"

When she remained silent, looking out the window for Joey, he added, "You do have a name, right?"

Emma gritted her teeth. It was obvious this guy wasn't going anywhere. And if she really was going to have to work with him she may as well be nice. "Emma."

"Em-ma." He drew it out and she had never before hated the sound of her own name. "Do you come with a last name, Emma?"

"Nelson," Joey said from the doorway. "As in 'Don't even think about it.' So go out to the lot."

Emma was taken aback at the snappiness of Joey's tone. It was very, very rare that he used that tone. He caught her gaze, noting the way her eyes widened in surprise. He took a deep breath and glanced back at a blushing Chip. "Sorry. Here, I'll go out with you and give you an overview of what to do." With instructions for Emma to make herself comfortable at the desk opposite his, he headed out.

She released a deep breath. That was not what she had expected for her first day in the office, that was certain. Joey was always so … Joey. Happy and cheerful and fun, and this was a side of him she hadn't seen since that long ago day she and Craig had skipped school. What exactly was it he disliked about Chip hitting on her? Besides the obvious of course. There had to be a reason, right?

'_Don't go there.' _Her subconscious hissed at her as she settled in at her desk. _'It's just Joey being overprotective. It doesn't mean anything.'_

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

Chip shifted his weight awkwardly from foot to foot and pushed his horn-rimmed glasses up on his nose. Anger was still radiating off Joey. He didn't get it. So he'd flirted a little with the girl in the office-what was the big deal? She was hot even if she was dressed like a middle aged bank teller.

"Look, Chip," Joey began, "I know Wheels only married your aunt a few months ago, but has he mentioned anything to you about Spike or Snake?"

Shaking his head at the absurdity of the 80's era nicknames these people gave themselves, he stated that he had, but not much.

Joey nodded. "What exactly did he say?" They began walking through the line of cars, Joey not wanting Emma to pop outside and overhear their conversation.

"Only that Spike had a baby when you guys were really young. Spike's the girl, right?" Chip said.

Nodding, Joey directed them to a small set of benches and tables he's set up by the lot entrance. They settled down onto them and he clasped his hands together on the wooden surface. "Yes. And we were very young. So I feel very protective of Emma. I don't want anything to happen to hurt you or make her feel uncomfortable. Are we clear?"

"Why's it bug you so bad?" Chip asked. "Sure you don't want her for yourself?"

Joey shot to his feet and glared at the younger man so hard that Chip squirmed uncomfortably. From everything his new Uncle Derek had told him about Joey he would have thought he'd have a better sense of humor. Apparently not.

"I'm your boss." Joey's voice had gone steely and his eyes, which had seemed so warm upon their first meeting, were hard. "And I'm her boss. So just stop hitting on her. Clear?"

He turned and walked back to his office, wanting nothing more than to fire the little pipsqueak he'd disliked the first time Wheels had brought him to the lot. But when one of his oldest friends had asked him to give his new wife's nephew a job he hadn't been able to say no. It was just for the summer. But if he kept hitting on Emma … then that would be it. She had obviously been uncomfortable and that was something he would not tolerate under any circumstances.

And it had nothing to do with the sporadic thoughts he had the night before about the way Emma had looked at him or how short her skirt had been. Because that would just be crazy. Right?

…0...0...0...0...0...0...

_**Yeah, this chapter ended a bit abruptly. Blame it on a certain **_**someone**_** and the mental images she put into my head while I was writing. They were very distracting to say the least. ;)**_


	7. Too Close For Comfort

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**Too Close for Comfort**

...0...

"Emma, was that your stomach?"

She looked up at Joey sheepishly from her desk. She had hoped that the low rumbles that had been occurring for the better part of the last hour would dissipate, but they had instead grown louder and louder- her stomach protesting her skipping breakfast and not having eaten lunch yet. "Yeah. I kind of haven't eaten anything today."

Joey dropped the pen he had been writing with onto the desk in front of him. "Emma!" Taking a deep breath so he wouldn't risk loosing his temper, he tried to calm his voice. "Why haven't you eaten today?"

Shifting uncomfortably in her seat, Emma began gnawing on her lip while she thought over what to say. Admitting the truth-that she had been too nervous about the prospect of an entire day with Joey-wasn't a feasible option. So what did she say? No matter what she came up with Joey was still going to think it was some sort of leftover anorexia related issue.

"Emma?" he prodded.

With a shrug, she looked him right in the eye and told him the first thing that popped into her head. "I was running late and just didn't have time. Honest."

Joey pursed his lips. Emma obviously wasn't telling him the truth-at least not the whole truth. She had never been able to lie without giving herself away. Her habit of chewing on her bottom lip whenever she was hiding something was a dead give away. "Really?"

She bobbed her head, her blonde hair shimmying around her shoulders. It caught the light from the window behind her, glimmering like pure sunlight, and distracted him momentarily. With a shake of his head to gather his thoughts, Joey fixed his eyes on Emma's face only to see her own big brown orbs locked onto him with a pleading look of anxiety. Picking up his phone, he asked, "Pizza or Chinese?"

Relief rushed through her, deflated the sheer terror that had been coursing through her veins. "Chinese."

"Corn nuggets, right?" he asked with a grin. "And sesame noodles?"

Her stomach growled once more, the mention of foods she loved and hadn't had in so long making her even hungrier if that were possible. She laughed, blushing, and nodded her head.

"Okay then. I'm just going to go see if Chip wants anything," he told her and headed out to the lot.

Emma sighed, leaning back in her chair, and rubbed her hands over her face. This was a lot harder than she had planned on. The basis of her logic for taking the job with Joey in the first place was her idea that if she were around him more, eventually her common sense would kick in and things would go back to normal.

No such luck.

Her stomach rumbled again and she looked down, grimacing. "You are no help whatsoever."

Joey walked back in, muttering under his breath and picked up the phone on her desk. She studied him; his jaw working in irritation and the glare in his eyes as he punched in a few buttons on the phone and ordered lunch. When he hung up, he exhaled slowly and glanced down at her.

"Joey, are you okay?" she asked tentatively.

"Yeah. I think I might need to call Wheels later and tell him his nephew is an idiot." He placed her phone back in its cradle and gave her a weak smile. "But there's no need to worry you with that. How's your work going over here?"

Frowning, Emma stood up from her chair and crossed her arms over her chest. "You're not going to worry me, Joey. In case you missed it, I don't really care much for him either."

"Emma-"

She shook her head, cutting off his reply. "You're one of the only people who has never walked on eggshells around me," she said softly. Stepping closer, she added, "Please don't start now."

Joey swallowed, nodding a bit. His eyes seemed a little confused; almost worried. But his gaze remained locked onto hers and Emma felt herself subconsciously leaning forward so slowly she doubted Joey could even notice. His eyes were just so dark…

The phone began ringing, jolting them out of their haze. Joey snatched up the phone. "Jeremiah Motors."

Emma sank back down into her seat, dazed. She turned back to the file entry she had been working on earlier-though she doubted the quality of her work was going to be anything to brag about. Her focus was totally shattered.

Joey cleared his throat, drawing her eyes back to him while he talked to someone about exhaust manifolds on the other end of the line. She studied the line of his back, his shoulders, realizing that Manny had been right about her getting in over her head in taking the job.

Things would get a whole lot worse before they got better.

…0...

A customer ended up staying past six, when they were supposed to be closed, milling around a VW Bug at the edge of the lot. Joey had offered to drive her home, and she would have felt horrible leaving just because it was taking longer than planned. Especially since Chip had stood, sighing and looking at his watch, until Joey told him to go ahead and head home at ten after.

At twenty till seven, the man finally decided to come back the next day with his wife rather than surprise her like he had been originally planning to do.

"Well that was fun," she joked. Joey grunted in response. As irritated as she was by the whole situation, Joey had to be even more annoyed than she was. After all, he had been the one to stand outside with him and stand there while he walked in continual circles around the car.

"You didn't have to wait," he told her. "I would have understood if you'd wanted to head home an hour ago." It had begun to rain, a slow drizzle falling on them as Joey locked up and they walked to his car. "Hang on." He pulled on the passenger door for a second before it finally opened. "It sticks."

Emma slid in and buckled her seatbelt while Joey started the car. "I didn't mind." She smiled at him, then leaned back into the soft leather seats as Joey pulled out onto the road. The rain was coming down steadier by then. Joey was driving slower than normal, stopping occasionally and idling, and for once had the radio off. It was very soothing.

She must have dozed off, because the next thing Emma was conscious of was Joey shaking her shoulder to wake her up. "Emma, wake up."

Her eyes cracked open slowly, not wanting to move. "Sorry," she mumbled. "Guess I dozed off, huh?" She gave him a sleepy smile, broken by a yawn, and laughed sheepishly. "I'll see you in the morning."

She pushed the door jamb, forgetting that it stuck until it refused to open.

Joey chuckled. "I told you." She fought back the urge to stick her tongue out at him for his teasing. "Let me," he said and leaned over her to take hold of the handle himself, pushing at it.

It didn't budge.

"Need some help there, Joey?" Emma asked, smiling brightly.

"No no," he insisted. "I'll get it. It's just gonna take…a second."

He tried again, bracing his other hand on the windowsill for better leverage. Emma sucked in a breath; Joey was almost on top of her in her seat. Scrunching her eyes tightly, she employed one of her therapy techniques and counted to ten in her head before opening them.

Just in time for Joey to push too hard-hard enough for his hand to slip and he knocked his head against hers.

"Damn it. Oww…oh my, Emma, I am so sorry," Joey sputtered, rubbing his forehead.

"No, its okay," she said and tossed a look at the door. "But at least you got the door open."

He laughed, not really seeing the humor in the situation at all. Emma felt his eyes on her-o rather the spot on her temple that was throbbing. He shook his head, blinking a bit, and touched his fingertips to the spot. Emma hissed.

"Sorry. It doesn't look too bad, but you'll probably have a bump there tomorrow."

"Guess I'll wear my hair down then," she joked, aiming her hand towards the low ponytail she was currently sporting to try and look a little more professional.

"Put some ice on it, and it should be fine," Joey stated. His fingers were still rubbing over the spot, a little softer now, and he seemed to have just realized it by the way he stopped suddenly and stared at her.

"Joey," she began. She didn't know what she was going to say, but she needed to say something.

Snapping backwards like he had been hit, Joey turned his head to the road. "Ice. Lots of ice."

"You said that already," she mumbled.

He nodded, swallowing roughly. "Then I'll see you in the morning. I gotta get home; m mom's probably already there with Angie."

Emma nodded. It appeared to be another point to her bad luck. An even worse than that-it looked like she had slipped, no pun intended, and given her feelings away to Joey. She walked up the walk, not really caring that she was getting wet, and swinging her purse idly. _'That,' _she thought, _'had to be the most awkward moment ever.'_

Her family was eating dinner when she walked in. She walked by them without a word and grabbed an ice pack from the freeze to put on her head.

"Emma what happened?" Spike asked, jumping up to check on her.

She sighed. "Nothing. Just a little accident trying to get the car door open."

Snake chuckled while Spike directed Emma to her own chair and inspected the bump beginning to come up on her skin. "Joey's been meaning to get that fixed for a while now. Maybe now that he's harming innocent bystanders he'll finally do it."

"Emma got boo-boo?" Jack asked from his high chair.

She smiled at her baby brother. "Nah. I'm fine."

He pulled the French fry he was munching on out of his mouth and handed to her. She took it, amid chuckles, and wondered what Joey was thinking right then.


End file.
